New episodes of the PERMISSION TO HEAL PODCAST drop every Wednesday everywhere you listen to podcasts. 

        <div class='title'>
          Pink Cute Chic Vintage 90s Virtual Trivia Quiz Presentations
Articles > Why Creating Boundaries with Toxic People is so Hard (& so dang Important).

Why Creating Boundaries with Toxic People is so Hard (& so dang Important).

I’ve known many toxic, narcissistic, selfish people in my life.

One person was particularly profound and long-lasting. The effects this had on my childhood and life created the blueprint for most of my relationships during my first 40 years.

My ex-husband was almost exactly like this person. They both saw the world through their own narrow lens of how it affected them. They gaslit me into behaving in ways that served them, and I allowed myself to be squelched and suffocated.

After 12 years of marriage, I finally came to terms with how miserable, lonely, and sad I was and realized that I did not want a marriage like this for my children. I decided to get a divorce; I wanted a better life for myself and to create a better life for them.

And in so doing, change the way they viewed relationships and how people should treat and love one another. I chose to create a new blueprint for them.

Doing this gave me trust in my inner voice; it allowed me to take a stand against the person who had hurt me so much in the past (for the first time).

I gave an ultimatum: drug rehabilitation or us (this person was an opiate addict, too). They chose drugs, and we never saw that person again. It was challenging, to say the least.

But on that day, I was reborn as the strong, lioness mother that my children needed me to be. I stopped being the scared, intimidated, dutiful daughter and stepped up to be the protector that my children deserved and needed me to be.

I broke the intergenerational cycle of mental illness and addiction by claiming my own life—for myself and my kids.

I learned to fill up my own cup so that it runneth over and helped to fill my children’s cups. My example taught them to fill their own cups.

We were free from the traps of toxicity and emotional abuse. I vowed never to allow anyone to make me feel like that again. I love myself. I will be love for my children and for the world.

Then, a few years ago, I found out that a coworker was bad-mouthing me at our workplace—and another friend told me what she was saying. Nothing that was being said was true, and those who were hearing the stories knew that. I was understandably outraged and hurt, but I realized that her betrayal and meanness reflected her, not me at all.

Anyone whose opinion mattered knew that the stories were lies. So I just ignored it and let it go. It didn’t affect my life or work at all and quickly disappeared into irrelevance.

I used to let things like that bother me, and those hurt feelings would linger for a long time. But I don’t let that kind of stuff bother me. I’ve eliminated toxic people from my life, for the most part, so this doesn’t really happen to me anymore. I’ve learned to care more about my own opinion of myself than anyone else’s.

The take-home message here is to create healthy boundaries for yourself and your life. Don’t allow other people to determine your worth—do that for yourself.

Stop caring if others love you. Love yourself.

Be love for yourself. Be love for your family and friends.

Be the love in the world.

1c crunched snajej

Trusted Art Seller

The presence of this badge signifies that this business has officially registered with the Art Storefronts Organization and has an established track record of selling art.

It also means that buyers can trust that they are buying from a legitimate business. Art sellers that conduct fraudulent activity or that receive numerous complaints from buyers will have this badge revoked. If you would like to file a complaint about this seller, please do so here.

2b crunched ctmrym

Verified Returns & Exchanges

The Art Storefronts Organization has verified that this business has provided a returns & exchanges policy for all art purchases.

Description of Policy from Merchant:

3c crunched udpkob

Verified Secure Website with Safe Checkout

This website provides a secure checkout with SSL encryption.


Your cart is currently empty.

Saved Successfully.

This is only visible to you because you are logged in and are authorized to manage this website. This message is not visible to other website visitors.


Import From Instagram

Click on any Image to continue

Create a New Favorite List


Badge ar compatible

The above preview shows how to use the live preview on this website. The image displayed is just an example, and is not available for sale.

Badge ar compatible

This Website Supports Augmented Reality to Live Preview Art

This means you can use the camera on your phone or tablet and superimpose any piece of art onto a wall inside of your home or business.

To use this feature, Just look for the "Live Preview AR" button when viewing any piece of art on this website!


Manage Favorites

Below, select which favorite lists you would like to save this product into.

Marci Brockmann Author, Artist, Podcaster & Educator

Let's be friends!

Hello, My New Friend!

I am so thrilled that you want to join the world of Marci Brockmann International! (Please complete the short form below.)

The mission of Marci Brockmann International is to create compassion and empathy while inspiring people to treat themselves with respect and love, give themselves the grace and space to heal from trauma, and transform and infuse beauty into their lives.


I hope that you enjoy exploring my multi-passionate world and that it inspires you to create love, beauty, and wellness in your own life.


One way to start on this beautiful, healing path is through my Free Expressive Writing Course.

(The self-paced, video format allows you to explore this way of writing and all the mental health and healing benefits it has in store for you.)



Remember, you only need your own permission to begin. 

Connect with me on Instagram @marcibrockmann27



Yours in friendship always,


= required